Hello, in about 45 minutes, the 64th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards will air live on the ABC network (from the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles), hosted by late night funnyman Jimmy Kimmel.
(The DJBC Happy Hour's Final Predictions: http://djbcadventures.tumblr.com/post/31986851312/the-djbc-happy-hour-2012-emmy-awards-preview-in)
8:03PM- Love the opening sketch; Jimmy Kimmel in the ladies room; classic, from Lena Dunham eating cake to Kimmel's face being punched in
8:04PM- "We are here tonight to honor television...the only product that China has not perfected."
8:05PM- "One of every five acting nominees are British."; "What it must have been like to live in Mitt Romney's house."- Mitt Romney on Downton Abbey; "Being a Republican in Hollywood, is being a Chick-fil-a sandwich on the snack table on 'Glee'."
8:06PM- "I don't think that Obama showld be watching 'Homeland' like Charlie Sheen should not be watching 'Breaking Bad'."- Jimmy Kimmel
8:07PM- The Academy is showing us a clear message: "Show us your boobs"- Jimmy Kimmel
8:08PM- "That's how the Emmys got their name...'M-E...Emmy.'"- Kimmel
8:08PM- "Most of you will be losers."
8:09PM- We start with the Comedy categories, and a look at the year in Comedy.
8:11PM- "Here to present the first of 800 awards tonight, please welcome Amy Poehler and Louis C.K."
8:11PM- "The first presenters set the tone...what we do or say make a difference. We could radiate love to this room or to the whole world."- Amy Poehler
8:12PM- Amy Poehler and Louis C.K. present the category for Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series.
8:13PM- Eric Stonestreet wins his second Emmy for Modern Family.
8:14PM- "There is no Cam without Mitch...we're only Mitch and Cam if we know that."- Eric Stonestreet; "I want to share this with every actor who has an audition in Santa Monica at 5:00 tomorrow."
8:15PM- Commercial Break (Supporting Actress is next)...
8:18PM- Welcome Back... "Try to imagine your favorite television stars looking at their phones, ignoring each other."- Jimmy Kimmel
8:19PM- Jim Parsons and Zooey Deschanel present the Emmy for Writing in a Comedy Series.
8:19PM- "I base my character Jess on the real Jim."- Jim Parsons
8:19PM- "I base Sheldon on the real Zooey."- Zooey Deschanel
8:20PM- "How would your childhood teachers describe you? (Question for Writing nominees)
8:20PM- Louis C.K. wins the Emmy for Writing in a Comedy Series for "Pregnant".
8:21PM- "I won an Emmy just now."- Louis C.K.
8:22PM- "What shows would have been like before cable." (The Breaking Bad Show, a la the Andy Griffith Show)
8:23PM- Jon Cryer and Kat Dennings present the Emmy for Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series.
8:24PM- Julie Bowen is back for a second helping of Emmy with a repeat win for Modern Family.
8:25PM- "My job really amounts to my falling down wearing lipstick and nipple covers."- Julie Bowen
8:26PM- Commercial Break
8:30PM- Back to the Emmys. Matthew Perry announces the Guest Acting winners for Comedy. "When the Academy asked me to announce them again, I asked, 'Why do they want me to do this, the winners have already been announced.' But then I realized I want attention."- Perry
8:32PM- Comedy Guest Acting winners Kathy Bates and Jimmy Fallo are presenting the Emmy for Directing in a Comedy Series.
8:33PM- "What kinds of people make the best Comedy directors?"
8:34PM- Steven Levitan wins the Emmy for Directing the Season 3 finale for Modern Family, "Baby on Board", which also won the covetous Bryan Award four short weeks ago.
8:34PM- "I would like to thank me for hiring me as a director when nobody else would."- Steven Levitan; "I would like to thank my wife Christa for being the best decision I ever made."; "With your cast and your crew, a complete idiot could have directed an episode of 'Modern Family'."
8:35PM- A clip with the cast of "Modern Family" (little Aubrey Anderson-Emmons is the scene stealer in this clip)
8:37PM- Mindy Kaling and Melissa McCarthy present the Emmy for Lead Actor in a Comedy Series.
8:39PM- Ducky did it again! Jon Cryer pulls off another upset for Two and a Half Men. He joins Robert Guillaume as the only Lead/Supporting Comedy winners in Emmy history.
8:40PM- "I did not just win this."- Jon Cryer; "This is crazy...thank you guys, good night."
8:40PM- Commercial Break
8:43PM- "I don't want to jinx it, but we've had a winner in every category."- Kimmel
8:44PM- Stephen Colbert presents the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Comedy Series. "We should not have a war on women. We should celebrate women. Women are wonderful."
8:45PM- "Five of them are just great, and the other two- I've been told I'm out of time."- Colbert
8:46PM- Julia Louis-Dreyfus wins the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Comedy Series for Veep. I think that she's the first to win three Comedy acting Emmys for regular roles in three different Comedy series.
8:46PM- JLD is reading Amy Poehler's acceptance speech.
8:47PM- "I don't see anything funny about being the Vice President of the United States."- Julia Louis-Dreyfus
8:48PM- "One last thing, isn't it a shame that Amy Poehler didn't win?"- JLD reading
8:49PM- That's all the Comedy races, and now it's time for Reality, and the "Year in Reality" clip show.
8:51PM- James Van Der Beek and Damon Wayans Jr. present the Emmy for Reality-Competition Series.
8:51PM- "A little bit of unscripted information...a score update, the Patriots lead the Ravens 3 to 0."- Damon Wayans Jr.
8:52PM- "The Amazing Race" makes it nine out of ten.
8:53PM- Commercial Break
8:56PM- A clip from "The Big Bang Theory"
8:57PM- "Not everyone there is popular...the writers and directors are there."- Penny
8:57PM- Sheldon, Leonard, and Penny are introducing the accountants from Ernst & Young in charge of the votes
8:58PM- Seth MacFarlane presents the award for Reality Host.
8:59PM- "Brian Dunkleman, Roger Lodge, Joey Greco, That's all I can think of."- Seth MacFarlane; "The winner will be signed to a record deal and the chance to charm their way into Donald Trump Jr.'s pants."
8:59PM- Tom Bergeron wins the Emmy for Reality Host. "This is satisfying, considering Betty White kicks my ass in our mixed martial arts class."; "I would like to thank Jeff Probst for not being nominated."- Bergeron
9:01PM- The year in Drama, with the Drama clip reel, moving over to the Drama races
9:04PM- "I gotta get out less."- Jimmy Kimmel; " Our next nominee is expecting a baby, but will present the nest category because the baby cannot read yet."
9:05PM- Claire Danes presents the Emmy for Supporting Actor in a Drama Series.
9:05PM- Aaron Paul wins the Emmy for Breaking Bad, being the first repeat winner of sorts in 16 years.
9:06PM- "I truly didn't attempt to prepare a speech."- Aaron Paul; "Vince Gilligan and the rest of the writers, thank you so much, for not killing me off."
9:07PM- Commercial Break
9:12PM- "I would like the people watching the Emmys at home to pull a prank on the people NOT watching the Emmys at home."- Jimmy Kimmel (post "Oh my God, Tracy Morgan just passed out on stage at the Emmys, turn ABC on now. We have a few seconds on time delay before ABC explodes.")
9:13PM- Connie Britton and Hayden Panettiere present the Emmy for Writing in a Drama Series.
9:14PM- "How do you handle Writer's Block?"- Writing in a Drama Series nominees
9:15PM- Alex Gansa, Howard Gordon, and Gideon Raff win the writing Emmy for the pilot of Homeland.
9:16PM- Britton & Panettiere also present the Emmy for Supporting Actress in a Drama Series.
9:17PM- Dame Maggie Smith wins the Emmy for Supporting Actress in a Drama Series Downton Abbey. Mad Men is 0-for-23 ALL-TIME in the Acting Races.
9:18PM- Commercial Break
9:22PM- Giancarlo Esposito introduces the Drama Guest Acting winners.
9:24PM- Drama Guest Acting winners Martha Plimpton and Jeremy Davies present the Directing in a Drama Series Emmy.
9:24PM- "Are You A Dramatic Person?"- Directing in a Drama Series Nominees
9:25PM- Salami (Tim Van Patten) wins the Emmy for Directing in a Drama Series for the Season 2 finale of "Boardwalk Empire", "To the Lost".
9:25PM- Jimmy Kimmel introduces a faux "Memoriam Tribute" to "the living", which are all clips of Kimmel himself through the years. Josh Groban is at the piano singing during this "Clip Show".
9:27PM- Julianna Margulies presents the Emmy for Lead Actor in a Drama Series.
9:28PM- Damian Lewis wins the Emmy for Lead Actor in a Drama Series for Homeland.
9:28PM- "Hello, I am Damian Lewis, one of those pesky Brits. I don't believe in judging art, but I'm proving just the case."- Damian Lewis
9:29PM- "My two children at home think I am nominated for an Emmy. Nanny and Gulliver, Daddy just won an Emma."- Lewis
9:30PM- Commercial Break
9:36PM- "Would anyone like to trade in an Emmy for a Hot Pocket?"- Kimmel
9:36PM- Jon Hamm and Tina Fey present the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Drama Series.
9:38PM- Claire Danes wins the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Drama Series for Homeland.
9:40PM- A clip show of Variety, the year in Variety.
9:42PM- Aziz Ansari and Jane Levy present the nominees for Variety Special Writing.
9:42PM- "On behalf of the British actors, thank you Hollywood for welcoming us."- Aziz Ansari
9:44PM- Louis C.K. also wins the Writing in a Variety Special for Louis C.K.: Live at the Beacon Theatre
9:45PM- "I wanted another one, so that's nice."- Louis C.K.
9:46PM- Commercial Break
9:49PM- Ricky Gervais presents the Emmy for Directing in a Variety, Music, or Comedy Special
9:52PM- From the stage to the truck, Glenn Weiss, who is in the truck directing the Emmys, won the Emmy for directing the 2011 Tony Awards.
9:53PM- "Mom and Dad, nine years of guilt is not able to get over quickly, thank you very much."- Glenn Weiss
9:54PM- Gervais also presents the Emmy for Variety, Music, or Comedy Series. Can Jon Stewart make it ten in a row, or will a new winner emerge?
9:55PM- Tic-Tac-Toe, TEN IN A ROW! (Need I say more?)
9:58PM- "We do topical comedy, which has the shelf life of egg shells after five days."- Jon Stewart
9:59PM- Commercial Break; End of Variety races, End of Second Hour
10:02PM- "You said I could do anything I wanted to, and you lied to me."- Jimmy Kimmel (after losing for Variety Series)
10:03PM- Miniseries/Movie Clip Show, the year in Miniseries/Movies
10:05PM- Steve Buscemi presents the Emmy for Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or Movie
10:06PM- Jessica Lange wins the Emmy for Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or Movie for American Horror Story (she won both the Golden Globe and the SAG Award in January as well)
10:08PM- Commercial Break
10:12PM- Bruce Rosenblum (Academy Chairperson) and Ellen DeGeneres are on the stage right now.
10:13PM- "You think that after 2 and a half hours, (Ellen DeGeneres) would be able to rustle up another pair of pants?"- Jimmy Kimmel (referring to Ellen DeGeneres in the opening sketch)
10:14PM- Kerry Washington presents the Emmy for Supporting Actor in a Miniseries or Movie.
10:15PM- Tom Berenger wins the Emmy for Supporting Actor in a Miniseries or Movie for his role as Uncle Jim Vance in "The Hatfields and McCoys".
10:15PM- "There's my 40 seconds, it's gone."; "I think that Emmy should have melted this into ten or eleven little pieces to all my family."- Tom Berenger
10:16PM- Ron Howard is on the stage to lead the Memoriam Segment, which starts with a tribute to his first TV father, Andy Griffith.
10:18PM- In Memoriam: Andy Griffith, Marvin Hamlisch, Davy Jones, Hal Kanter, Richard Dawson, Jim Paratore, Lee Rich, Sherman Hemsley, Phyllis Diller, William Asher, Celeste Holm, Michael Clarke Duncan, Lupe Ontiveros, James Farentino, Irving Fein, Heavy D, Chad Everett, Don Cornelius, Robert Hegyes & Ron Palillo, Robert Easton, Andy Rooney, John Rich, Michele O;'Callaghan, Steve Jobs, Gil Cates, Bob Henry, Albert Freeman Jr, Patrice O'Neal, Whitney Houston, Ben Gazzara, Donna Summer, Tony Scott, Kathryn Joosten, Paul Bogart, William Windom, Norman Felton, Frank Pierson, Mike Wallace, Ernest Borgnine, Harry Morgan, and Dick Clark were among those whom we lost this past year
10:22PM- Commercial Break
10:26PM- Lucy Liu and Kiefer Sutherland present the Emmys for Writing and Lead Actress in a Miniseries or Movie. First up, Writing.
10:27PM- Danny Strong wins the Emmy for Writing in a Miniseries or Movie for "Game Change".
10:28PM- Liu and Sutherland also present Lead Actress in a Miniseries or Movie.
10:28PM- Julianne Moore wins the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Miniseries or Movie for her role as Sarah Palin in Game Change.
10:29PM- "I feel so validated, because Sarah Palin gave me a big 'thumbs-down'."- Julianne Moore
10:31PM- Commercial Break
10:35PM- "I saw a moment ago that Jon Stewart is not in his seat. He threw his Emmy in the trash and walked out backstage. Something to remember next Emmy voting season."- Kimmel
10:36PM- ABC lovelies Ginnifer Goodwin and Emily Van Camp present the Emmy for Directing in a Miniseries or Movie
10:36PM- Jay Roach wins the Emmy for Directing for Game Change
10:36PM- "It's so freakin' hard to get films about politics done."- Jay Roach
10:37PM- Goodwin and Van Camp also present the Emmy for Lead Actor in a Miniseries or Movie
10:38PM- Kevin Costner wins the Emmy for his role as William Anderson 'Devil Anse' Hatfield in "The Hatfields and McCoys"
10:39PM- "We had to go all the way to Romania to film that 'Great American Story'."- Kevin Costner
10:39PM- "For those who haven't seen it, there is always TV and reruns."- Costner
10:40PM- THREE CATEGORIES LEFT! Can Mad Men make it "One for the Thumb" or will they suffer the biggest shutout in Emmy history? But first...another Commercial Break
10:45PM- Andre Braugher presents the Emmy for Made for Television Movie or Miniseries.
10:46PM- Game Change wins the Emmy for Outstanding Made for Television Movie or Miniseries. (Another Emmy win for Tom Hanks)
10:46PM- "We would like to thank the Founding Fathers..."- Tom Hanks
10:47PM- "Am I nuts or does that guy in the mustache look like Tom Hanks?"- Jimmy Kimmel
10:48PM- Julianne Moore presents the Emmy for Outstanding Drama Series. Can Mad Men make it 5 in a row, or will a new champion be crowned?
10:48PM- THE STREAK IS OVER! Homeland wins the Emmy for Outstanding Drama Series. Bad news for Mad Men. Mad Men has set a new Emmy record, that for Biggest Shutout in Emmy History, going 0-for-17. That's right. 17 nominations, 17 losses for Mad Men. OUCH.
10:49PM- "I don't know if they're going to cut me off, but it's the biggest night of my career."- Howard Gordon, accepting the Emmy for Homeland in Outstanding Drama Series (the 2012 Bryan Award winner for Outstanding New Series); Homeland is the VERY FIRST Drama Series winner for Showtime
10:51PM- ONE MORE CATEGORY LEFT, Michael J. Fox presents the Comedy Series Emmy, but one last commercial break
10:53PM- All the male acting winners = UPSETS; All the female acting winners = FRONTRUNNERS
10:55PM- Marty McFly and Alex P. Keaton present the Emmy for Outstanding Comedy Series, but first, a standing ovation for Columbus's native son, Alexander P. Keaton.
10:55PM- "We were told that laughter is the best medicine, and that Facebook has a 38 percent share."
10:56PM- Modern Family makes it THREE in a row in the Comedy Series category, 45 wins and 12 nominations in three seasons. As my college buddy Jeff would say, "Not toooo shabby."
10:57PM- What was the best and worst? Find out tomorrow night LIVE on The DJBC Happy Hour on WCRS-FM, 102.1 FM and 98.3 FM in Columbus, Ohio and streaming online at (http://wcrsfm.org)
10:58PM- **Steve Levitan gets cut off**; "Did you guys want to stay another hour? Thanks for watching."- Jimmy Kimmel closing the category
Homeland (first non-Mad Men winner since 2007)
Game Change (Miniseries/Movie champ)
Modern Family (third consecutive Comedy Series win)
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (record tenth consecutive Variety Series win)
(If you count Daytime Emmys, since I didn't blog those) General Hospital (a record 9 Daytime Emmy wins)
MAD MEN = Biggest Shutout in Emmy History (17 nominations, 17 losses)
American Horror Story
Saturday Night Live (still can't beat Jon Stewart, no matter what)
11:02PM- That's all she wrote on the Emmys. I'm going to digest what I saw tonight, and compile it for a LIVE report on tomorrow night's LIVE DJBC Happy Hour. Congrats to all of the Emmy winners! Good night.